My brother is mentally handicap and on SSI. We recently moved so we have to pay a visit to SSA office to change the address. Did you know that if SSA gets return mail on you, they stop your monthly payments?! Yeah, that happened to us last year. It took over a month to get the checks Rollin again! We were late on rent (late fee) and that screw up caused several NSF checks. His payment is direct deposit. Why do they stop payment on direct deposit???
Oh, that reminds me: gotta get address change on drivers license and vehicle registration. Fun. Not in FL!
Thursday, December 5, 2013
Tuesday, December 3, 2013
Elf on a Shelf
Does the end justify the means?
Yes? We want our children to learn to listen, be good, etc.. But do we really want to promote LIES? We are supposed to be modeling good moral character. It was bad enough with the Santa thing. Now, we are emphasizing the Santa lies with "the creepy elf is watching your every move" lie.
Nice. Really?
Yes? We want our children to learn to listen, be good, etc.. But do we really want to promote LIES? We are supposed to be modeling good moral character. It was bad enough with the Santa thing. Now, we are emphasizing the Santa lies with "the creepy elf is watching your every move" lie.
Nice. Really?
Monday, December 2, 2013
A year to remember
OMG where does the time go!? I just remembered I haven't been here "in a while" and now I see it's been 11 months, y'all. So much has happened.
- Put an end to Jamal games January 2
- Finally got Jamal to give me Islamic divorce in April
- Grand ma "mama-san" passed in April after 3 yr battle with mesothelioma
- Busch gardens field trip in May with the older kids middle school classes. Ugh
- Kids got another sis in June
- Kids first little sis turned ONE in July
- Finally approved for disability July 3
- First disability ck came in August. No problem figuring out how to spend it! Yes, I did get credit report addressed.
- Sept my oldest started high school!
- Oct brought another check and a trip to Universal Studios AND Islands of Adventure
- New 2011 van October 31
- Lease on 59th street ended nov 30 so all of nov was about house hunting, credit approval, movers, packing, and movin on up to Pasco county! Country. Cows in pastures across the street country. No Golden Corral for like 10 miles country. But: NO WELL WATER!!!
- Now here we are in December. Kids are finally happy at my house. Moms happy. I'm so happy that I finally feel like cooking ! Bought Rachel Ray 15 PC cookware set. And 50 miles (give or take) from st Petersburg :-)
Tuesday, January 29, 2013
Step one to healing?
took kiddos to school.
Got home and the Bro (mentally handicapped) had put all the dishes away - the DIRTY DISHES!!
Now, I got those done, that I'd planned to PROcrastinATE, I put out some job apps, and now putting off going out to fax some important doc's.
Still have migraine.
Had counsel yesterday.
Nice.
1st lesson on letting go of worry about Jamal's wife problems even though I have good intentions.
I've been thinking to myself ... never to anyonelse for fear that I might be right... that I might be part of the problem.
I know I come across harsh. I've never been one to "beat around the bush." I am impatient and "tell it like it is." I have never denied that. But how severe is this issue, really? Having not gotten to know Jamal's wife, she is a bit of a "fictional character" to me in a way so I think I have treat the "subject" of Taghreed as ok for me to be involved in. I need to respect that she is a real person and deserves her privacy and I need to leave that subject alone. Whatever happens between them is not for me to worry about or discuss to anyone else. The matter that she doesnt want to talk with me is HER issue, not mine, and I have to leave it at that.
So, After making a final decision with the counselor yesterday that I want to be away from Jamal, guess what?? He shows up at my house last night with food. (somewhere during that time, my eyeglasses got knocked off the table and someone stepped on them!!) He's made dinner reservations for he and I, but after I kept refusing, he did this. I ended up running out of the out, pitch black outside, ran to McDonalds - without glasses. He ended up following me after he prayed. We got coffee and drove and talked and drove and talked. He's still trying to convince me that we belong together. I'd totally agree if there wasnt the other MARRIAGE that exists!!
OMG, I have this migraine for over a week. I didnt work the temp jobs yesterday nor today and cant tomorrow cuz I have to check out this day program for Bro.
Think I'll go take a nap and put off the blog.
Got home and the Bro (mentally handicapped) had put all the dishes away - the DIRTY DISHES!!
Now, I got those done, that I'd planned to PROcrastinATE, I put out some job apps, and now putting off going out to fax some important doc's.
Still have migraine.
Had counsel yesterday.
Nice.
1st lesson on letting go of worry about Jamal's wife problems even though I have good intentions.
I've been thinking to myself ... never to anyonelse for fear that I might be right... that I might be part of the problem.
I know I come across harsh. I've never been one to "beat around the bush." I am impatient and "tell it like it is." I have never denied that. But how severe is this issue, really? Having not gotten to know Jamal's wife, she is a bit of a "fictional character" to me in a way so I think I have treat the "subject" of Taghreed as ok for me to be involved in. I need to respect that she is a real person and deserves her privacy and I need to leave that subject alone. Whatever happens between them is not for me to worry about or discuss to anyone else. The matter that she doesnt want to talk with me is HER issue, not mine, and I have to leave it at that.
So, After making a final decision with the counselor yesterday that I want to be away from Jamal, guess what?? He shows up at my house last night with food. (somewhere during that time, my eyeglasses got knocked off the table and someone stepped on them!!) He's made dinner reservations for he and I, but after I kept refusing, he did this. I ended up running out of the out, pitch black outside, ran to McDonalds - without glasses. He ended up following me after he prayed. We got coffee and drove and talked and drove and talked. He's still trying to convince me that we belong together. I'd totally agree if there wasnt the other MARRIAGE that exists!!
OMG, I have this migraine for over a week. I didnt work the temp jobs yesterday nor today and cant tomorrow cuz I have to check out this day program for Bro.
Think I'll go take a nap and put off the blog.
Saturday, January 26, 2013
Still Depressed - What can I do?
Jamal is still calling us "married in the religion."
I'm still trying to pull apart from him.
Every time I find the time and energy to take the serious steps to push him away ("I'm really serious about it this time!"), he gets our now 13 year old son depressed and upset at me for "pulling our family apart."
Last week I met with the muslim woman who couciled Jamal and I in our marriage prior to him divorcing me ... well the civil "American divorce." She is the age of Jamal's mother and has been all over the WORLD in U.S. embassies representing women's rights. She gave me "homework": take a walk 3 times in this week. Ten minutes out, ten minutes back. Oh, and don't get involved in arguing with Jamal.
Oh I have such a migraine headache this week.
I know I love Jamal. But when he went and married Taghreed in 2010, it just has to be over for us. I cannot be involved in this plural "Islamic polygamy marriage." Taghreed doesnt want it either. What was he thinking?! How is it that he would think that we would both go along with this?! Does he really think that he is "all that"?!
He and Taghreed had the child called Aya July 19, 2012. Now, I found out the first week of Jan. she is pregnant again. Last night he told me she is almost 17 weeks pregnant. That means this baby will come just about exactly on Aya's FIRST birthday.
I know... i shouldnt worry about this. I should say "none of my business." However, he keeps saying he's broke, poor, hasnt paid the mortgage in over a year... and his mom, dad, 3 brothers - adult (over 30 yr old) , and a nephew who's here in the country for college live in the attached one bedroom mother-in-law apartment. In his home is him, Taghreed, Aya, his sister who is in college, and my 3 children who are there part-time. It is a 3 bed-room. Now, he's making it clear he's anxious to have more kids.... and not wanting to move because he's not having to pay rent/mortgage. My 12 yr daughter tells me the roof still leaks... they still leave the big plastic storage bins out to catch rain.
I still wonder if there is mold in the attic. I am going to have to call dept of children and families to check it out now that there is suspicion... that's not goin to go over well with him and her. But as a teacher (mandated reporter for other people's kids), I'd be a horrible mom not to make sure my own kids are ok.
ugh.
headache
I'm still trying to pull apart from him.
Every time I find the time and energy to take the serious steps to push him away ("I'm really serious about it this time!"), he gets our now 13 year old son depressed and upset at me for "pulling our family apart."
Last week I met with the muslim woman who couciled Jamal and I in our marriage prior to him divorcing me ... well the civil "American divorce." She is the age of Jamal's mother and has been all over the WORLD in U.S. embassies representing women's rights. She gave me "homework": take a walk 3 times in this week. Ten minutes out, ten minutes back. Oh, and don't get involved in arguing with Jamal.
Oh I have such a migraine headache this week.
I know I love Jamal. But when he went and married Taghreed in 2010, it just has to be over for us. I cannot be involved in this plural "Islamic polygamy marriage." Taghreed doesnt want it either. What was he thinking?! How is it that he would think that we would both go along with this?! Does he really think that he is "all that"?!
He and Taghreed had the child called Aya July 19, 2012. Now, I found out the first week of Jan. she is pregnant again. Last night he told me she is almost 17 weeks pregnant. That means this baby will come just about exactly on Aya's FIRST birthday.
I know... i shouldnt worry about this. I should say "none of my business." However, he keeps saying he's broke, poor, hasnt paid the mortgage in over a year... and his mom, dad, 3 brothers - adult (over 30 yr old) , and a nephew who's here in the country for college live in the attached one bedroom mother-in-law apartment. In his home is him, Taghreed, Aya, his sister who is in college, and my 3 children who are there part-time. It is a 3 bed-room. Now, he's making it clear he's anxious to have more kids.... and not wanting to move because he's not having to pay rent/mortgage. My 12 yr daughter tells me the roof still leaks... they still leave the big plastic storage bins out to catch rain.
I still wonder if there is mold in the attic. I am going to have to call dept of children and families to check it out now that there is suspicion... that's not goin to go over well with him and her. But as a teacher (mandated reporter for other people's kids), I'd be a horrible mom not to make sure my own kids are ok.
ugh.
headache
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